It has been my plan for some time to rid the house of carpeting and put in laminate floors. Rocky and I had the first of them put down several years ago in our kitchen.
We had new carpeting put in the rest of the house and we were happy as clams. But…..our happiness was short lived. We had two cats at the time and before the flooring crew left our driveway both cats began throwing up.

I was told it was the strong dye odor and they’re so close to the floor it made them sick. Well….let me tell you, they were sick a long time because more times than I care to count I found myself cleaning up their vomit additions to the carpet.

Then Mandy came along. She was 2 years old and supposedly house-broken. She was extremely nervous and it took months and months to finally find a schedule that agreed with her. Doggie pee and poop are not on my fun list.

During these times I was thinking how the carpet was just a “spot” magnet. However, I stayed the course and kept on cleaning until I saw the floor in LJ’s room at Thanksgiving. It was laminate and so clean and neat. It was one of those moments when I knew the time had come. I couldn’t get home soon enough to begin ripping the carpet up. In fact, Marc and George did the ripping. Marc put down the flooring in the living room and hall before he had to leave for home. George helped and at the last, Becky helped. We had over-bought I think because the living-room, hall and one bedroom has been finished and there is enough left for the last room. Not a bad problem as it saved further expense to finish.

Monday will finish the last room and this weekend I will be emptying all the shelves over the desk area and then the file cabinets and desktop Rocky rigged up for me. Then I can finally be rid of the sawdust and retrieve the space the flooring boxes took up. It will be an effort getting everything back to the proper rooms and fine tune everything.

At last the “make-over” will be complete and I can think about something else. I have put my heart and soul into the past months because it is the only way I can get through each day without Rocky. I am a strong woman and I know how to do the grieving steps. My head is the logical part of grieving…..it’s the heart that will not accept the fact he is gone. A certain song, a word, a smile…..revisits me often and a flood of emotion runs amuck.

Imagine your soul-mate gone for a week….a month….a year…..or always. Time doesn’t change anything. To survive I find doing or giving or helping others is the best medicine. It brings enough satisfaction to make my life worthwhile.

In the meantime God hears the prayers I will never speak. He is the still, small voice that soothes and nourishes and equips me enough for one day at a time……….

Essentially Esther