Tuesday, May 20, 2008
HOPING FOR A CURE.....
I have been saddened since learning my sister-in-law has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, actually her diagnosis was about a year ago. Her husband, my brother, died in 1989 of lung cancer and she stayed for a while in the home on Lake Washington where they had lived and enjoyed the lifestyle of the area. She was working at the time and continued doing so until she was able to retire sometime later.
She busied herself with the things women like to do and spent a lot of time going through family things. Like most of us there were boxes of mementoes from several families and she systematically went through them all and divided it up into boxes to send to the appropriate ones. She sent a large box of my brother’s things to me because they never had children and our parents are dead.
It took some time to go through after it came and there are a few things I couldn’t deal with until sometime later. Pictures, mementoes from his Military Service in Italy and sentimental things made for mom and dad when he was just a kid. He literally kept everything…….he was not one to get rid of things.
My sister-in-law sold their home a few years later and moved into a beautiful home with a manicured yard away from the lake. She was never happy there. She said she never unpacked most of the boxes because she didn’t feel “at home” there. She traveled a lot and went on several cruises with family but she was like a wandering star. She never felt like she belonged anywhere.
The progression of her illness was undetected at first from her letters and phone visits. Little by little I began to see changes in her ability to absorb conversation or to connect her speech in what she was trying to say. As the months went by her handwriting and sentence structure, spelling etc; were changing each time we talked or in the letters she wrote.
Some of her family helped her sell her home in Seattle and move into a duplex for a while and later to a retirement community back in her home State. When I called the number given me I was told she may not be able to talk to me but I could try……there were two women talking back and forth trying to decide how to handle my call. Finally, I did talk with Gail and had no problem but it was like talking to a little child.
In years past we shared a lot of good times together for she was broad minded and fun. Her premier job in life was to laugh at all the silly antics of my brother. They were bonkers over each other and had 25-years together before my brother died. I am sad because my contacts with her are slipping away and I know sooner or later will end.
If I had my way I would never lose any one I have loved but that isn’t the way God planned things. I can only believe that He is taking us to something beyond the confines we know in this life. That is why we should never waste a day that we are given. It is my hope, what ever my ultimate demise, that I can leave a lot of love and good memories behind.
I know we shall go from life to life and to one we could never imagine. Every time I send a contribution to Alzheimer’s I think of my aunt Sally and Gail and more recently a brother-in-law. It is my way of declaring that they are not forgotten and maybe some day there will be a cure. So many hope for a miracle. In the meantime I communicate with my sister-in-law as best I can and pray she will have some quality time left.
To the families who care for their loved ones with Alzheimer’s I have great respect for you and the fight you are going through. I can only imagine the overwhelming emotional and physical stress you must be feeling. There are many others, like me, who contribute to find a cure. I hope it comes soon enough for you and your loved one.
Essentially Esther
She busied herself with the things women like to do and spent a lot of time going through family things. Like most of us there were boxes of mementoes from several families and she systematically went through them all and divided it up into boxes to send to the appropriate ones. She sent a large box of my brother’s things to me because they never had children and our parents are dead.
It took some time to go through after it came and there are a few things I couldn’t deal with until sometime later. Pictures, mementoes from his Military Service in Italy and sentimental things made for mom and dad when he was just a kid. He literally kept everything…….he was not one to get rid of things.
My sister-in-law sold their home a few years later and moved into a beautiful home with a manicured yard away from the lake. She was never happy there. She said she never unpacked most of the boxes because she didn’t feel “at home” there. She traveled a lot and went on several cruises with family but she was like a wandering star. She never felt like she belonged anywhere.
The progression of her illness was undetected at first from her letters and phone visits. Little by little I began to see changes in her ability to absorb conversation or to connect her speech in what she was trying to say. As the months went by her handwriting and sentence structure, spelling etc; were changing each time we talked or in the letters she wrote.
Some of her family helped her sell her home in Seattle and move into a duplex for a while and later to a retirement community back in her home State. When I called the number given me I was told she may not be able to talk to me but I could try……there were two women talking back and forth trying to decide how to handle my call. Finally, I did talk with Gail and had no problem but it was like talking to a little child.
In years past we shared a lot of good times together for she was broad minded and fun. Her premier job in life was to laugh at all the silly antics of my brother. They were bonkers over each other and had 25-years together before my brother died. I am sad because my contacts with her are slipping away and I know sooner or later will end.
If I had my way I would never lose any one I have loved but that isn’t the way God planned things. I can only believe that He is taking us to something beyond the confines we know in this life. That is why we should never waste a day that we are given. It is my hope, what ever my ultimate demise, that I can leave a lot of love and good memories behind.
I know we shall go from life to life and to one we could never imagine. Every time I send a contribution to Alzheimer’s I think of my aunt Sally and Gail and more recently a brother-in-law. It is my way of declaring that they are not forgotten and maybe some day there will be a cure. So many hope for a miracle. In the meantime I communicate with my sister-in-law as best I can and pray she will have some quality time left.
To the families who care for their loved ones with Alzheimer’s I have great respect for you and the fight you are going through. I can only imagine the overwhelming emotional and physical stress you must be feeling. There are many others, like me, who contribute to find a cure. I hope it comes soon enough for you and your loved one.
Essentially Esther
