Thank you for all the birthday greetings and good wishes. I had a quiet day at home and enjoyed a marathon of phone calls. The bulk of cards came yesterday since Monday was Memorial Day with no mail delivery. Becky and I spent most of the day together since she was off work and the time went by before we knew it. For Becky, that meant back to work for her and for me, it was housework.

Being alone doesn’t mean you are lonely. I am a person who has never known what “boredom” means. Yesterday I enjoyed changing one of the rooms and having a fresh “look.” What it “doesn’t” mean is that I no longer miss Rocky. I will always miss him but I choose not to let it ruin each day. That would be something that would dishonor the gift God gave us for the six great years we had. It would also dishonor Rocky’s trust in me……that I would be “O.K.” We knew it wouldn’t be easy but we both knew I would make it through.

At times we all wonder what our purpose in life is. When Rick Warren came out with his blockbuster book, The Purpose Driven Life, it was on the best seller list. If you hadn’t read it before, you were certain to read it after the bizarre event where a young mother was taken captive by a fugitive and they spent the night talking about the book. I received the book with a leather bound journal from John and Barb.

Years ago I thought to be used of God, you had to be Billy Graham or a Pope or something significant. That turned into an idea that you would have to give up everything and become a missionary or something. I yearned “to do” something to show my gratitude but found He wants us “to be.” The “to do” thing is what we conger up thinking we’re helping God out…..He is much more interested on our inside, our motives. “To be” is the attitude He can work with.

I was a lazy Christian and didn’t find out answers for myself. If Christ was a “personal” Savior then I needed to get into His book. I am thankful for the mass media and knowledge from books today that we didn’t have when I was needing my answers. It was mainly me and the Bible or pastors and Sunday School teachers. I learned they don’t always have the whole truth either so it became my mission to find out for myself. Something we should do with every endeavor.

Usually we wake up and discover we have been doing the things all along that is our “purpose.” I have always tried to offer a helping hand when I could. Sick, down on your luck, hospitality, a shoulder to cry on, advice when asked, a listener, a helper or one who shares. Simple little things that helped at the time but were a comfort to others. I grew up watching my parents and other family members doing the same so I came by it in a practical way.

I’m a free psychologist, nurse, hairdresser, seamstress…..whatever! I’m your girl!

Until the next time, I am,
Essentially Esther