We have met the Hospice folks from the entry level to the Chaplain, the nurse and the Social Services lady. We have liked them all and if needed we can arrange for a Volunteer to come “sit” with Rocky while I run errands or whatever is needed.

While we are grateful for the options I can’t see we will be needing the Volunteer for some time, if ever. We are used to pitching in and taking care of the necessities and with Becky next door she will be glad to run errands while I stay with Rocky. At the present time he is able to ride along and enjoy getting out but I know one of these days he won’t be able to do that.

Rocky has had a couple of bad days. The nurse called a prescription in for Ativan and after three pills he couldn’t walk, keep his balance, make sense with anything he said and has slept almost all of two days and nights. Something about the Rockenbach kids makes medicine work on them that way. One mg will act as five or ten for them. I stopped giving them to him last evening and he is still trying to wake up. Just a bump in the road until we get the dosage down to where it’s working correctly.

He is becoming more yellow every day. I don’t know how long the liver will be able to fight off the onset of the cancer but Rocky is sure trying. I dread the day when he will tell me it’s just too hard to go on. I know that day will eventually come but in the meantime we keep working for another week, another day, another hour. He has put up a whale of a fight…….Rocky is my hero.

I am a firm believer that when the going gets tough, the tough get going. We come from a Finnish, German, Danish and Irish background so we’re tough…..at least in our hard heads. Sometimes that’s a good thing. No one likes to be a quitter and I sure can’t say that about Rocky……hopefully not myself.

I cannot say often enough how much we appreciate the phone calls, the emails, or the comments on the blog site. Having a good support group is always beneficial to those of us who are beyond helping ourselves. More than anything, the prayers. If you ever wonder how many friends you have……become seriously ill. It is the great “eye opener” of how many and how much.

I believe it is important to always let your family and friends know how much you love them. They cannot hear you once they are gone and they cannot see or smell flowers you might bring at their death. My mother always had a plaque over her cedar chest that read: Give me my flowers while I live….I shall not pass this way again.”

Some people live their whole lives and never hear a kind word. I never want to be guilty of missing the chance to tell someone I love them. Those three little words are the most powerful by far…………

Until the next time, I am,
Essentially Esther