Becky brought some startling news last evening. She had been to the neighbors to visit and learned they have their place up for sale. They had broached the subject to us a few times in passing but we didn’t take it seriously. It’s funny how your mind does a recoil when information pops in unexpected. Somehow I thought they would always be there……next door to the Rockenbachs.

Sudden and sad images flashed across my mind of the good times we’ve had together. We’ve eaten back and forth, shared birthdays, funerals, the birth of Davey, holidays and lots of visiting over the fence as we worked in our yards. Now they would be moving to St. Louis as soon as they sell their property.

I understand their reasoning and I’m sure it will be a good move for them. Dave was hurt in a routine motorist-check some years back, injured pretty seriously, in fact….and was forced to retire from the City Police when he realized he could no longer perform his duties as he knew he needed to. It was a personal decision made by him.

For a man used to working, his forced retirement was difficult. A small town doesn’t offer much in the way of employment for someone who has health issues. There just aren’t that many places to work…….still they made the best of a bad situation.

They will have a lot more opportunity in St. Louis to work and enjoy more of their family members. Little Davey will also have more opportunities growing up in a more progressive school system. Somehow the good reasoning of it doesn’t change the lump I feel every time I think of it. I can not blame them at all……it’s like a death. You are happy for the person knowing they will be in heaven but you feel a terrible loss in their absence.

Much has been written about old folks not liking change and I confess I am normal in that assessment. It’s a sad state of affairs because the older you grow, the more changes you have to face. Certainly a different stand than I took in my teens, twenties and beyond. I loved change and required it. But something happened.

I remember talking with mom and trying to get her to go places, call her friends, go shopping……..to DO something with her days. She only looked at me with a slight pity registered on her face…… “You’ll see, Esther. You’ll find out. Being quiet and being at home is not a bad thing. I enjoy my quiet time.” I used to think mom and I were geared so different……..but I discovered only at that time.

When I reached the age she was when I was giving her my pep talks, it dawned on me how right mom was. It’s wonderful to be quiet, to relax, to be out of the loop and letting the day “happen” rather than trying to push it along.

So much of my life was constant motion. I packed 900 years into one short lifetime. I left home early, married early, had three children early………worked at several responsible jobs…kept up a constant social life…raised children, took care of several elderly family members and retired at the age of 65.

I’ve had three husbands, several step families and have always done my own work. Trust me when I say I was packing a lot into a few years. Now as I reflect on my life I didn’t have a lot of time to waste or relax, however you prefer to call it, but I find that sitting down with a magazine, a good book or keeping up with emails is a good thing.

Gone is the desire to be with people all the time…..the need to be busy all the time or to look for things to do. Change is for the young, the restless and the ambitious. I am no longer any of that…..but I applaud those who carry on for the next generation.

Someone wrote once that the only change we can really count on is that there will always be changes…….well, here’s to the champions of change……now where is my cup of coffee and new magazine?

I wish Dave and Patty God-speed and an open door whenever they come our way again…………we’ll leave a light on for ya‘.

Until tomorrow,
Essentially Esther