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Friday, August 04, 2006

FUNNY ONE-LINERS..... 

John’s wife, Barbara, sent an email that I enjoyed very much. In fact, it was so good I’m re-printing the quotations I liked best for you to enjoy. I like the way it sends mini-messages in one-liners. Maybe you will identify with some of them as I did. Here goes…..
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Don’t let your worries get the best of you, remember, Moses started out as a basket case.

Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.

People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.

Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your door forever.

Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn’t belong.

God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead, so why should you?

Some minds are like concrete: thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

I don’t know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?

We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.

Be ye fishers of men. You catch them - He’ll clean them.

Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.

Forbidden fruits create many jams.

God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

God grades on the cross, not the curve.

God loves everyone, but probably prefers “fruits of the Spirit” over “religious nuts.”

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

He who angers you, controls you!
If God is your co-pilot….swap seats!

The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.

The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.

We don’t change the message…the message changes us.

You can tell how big a person is by how much it takes to discourage him.

The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.
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Thank you, Barb. Thanks for the smiles this brought……….

Until Monday,
Essentially Esther