Monday, June 05, 2006
CHOICES.....
Choices. We are all victims of the choices we’ve made. Some of us are older now and the wrong turns we took are far away but good reminders not to take the same road again. Life is pretty much what we make it. I get pretty tired of folks that can’t square their shoulders and admit when they’ve done something wrong.
My children learned early that their punishment was much more harsh if they lied about something they did. The best thing was to tell me before I found out from someone else. Then we talked about what happened and that was the end of it. Did they ever lie and get away with it? I’m sure they did but at least they knew it had better be a pretty good lie or they knew what was in store for them.
Perimeters need to be set and adhered to. I watch Dr. Phil more than I care to because Rocky likes the show. I sort of have overkill on it now but was a big fan for a long time. My reason for mentioning this is because some of the parents he has on the show are so disgusting I can’t see why they ever thought they wanted to have children.
Does any family sit down and have a meal together any more? Growing up, supper was never taken up until we heard dad’s old panel truck pulling in the driveway. Then we all ate. My brother and I were not chauffeured about to events apart from the family. Where my mother and dad went, we went. We were a family and we went every where together. Granted, we went places we didn’t want to go and we didn’t get to go to some of the places we wanted…….but we weren’t raised by nanny’s or baby sitters, we had a real dad and a real mother.
I was fortunate to be what the modern world calls a “stay at home mom.” Once the children came there was no question about leaving them for a career. They were my career and I didn’t plan on “having it all.” It was harder on the kid’s dad because he didn’t have the comfort of that extra pay check coming in…..but we knew where our kids were and what they were doing. The things we couldn’t give them were substituted for things we could give them.
I’m not knocking women who work after their children are born. It’s a very personal decision and there are many good reasons for doing so. What I am knocking are parents who go after everything except their children and then wonder why their kids are so detestable. Hello……it could be a lack of parenting.
I am not a poster gal for Mother of the Year and there were a lot of times I felt inadequate and made mistakes……. but I knew if I didn’t live to see the results I’d hoped for, they would come sooner or later. I still think life’s lessons have to be shown rather than talked about. Kids will learn more from watching you in the trenches than they ever will from what you say. Kids today are no different from the era I grew up in. My brother and I learned some harsh lessons in harsh times but we also learned respect, gratitude, sacrifice and a good work ethic.
Kids are more resilient than they’re given credit for a lot of times. My prayer is that parents will become acquainted with their own kids, put their time in and try to make some decent people. They are after all like a bank. You get back what you put in it…….if you don’t like what you’re getting back……try putting more into it.
I read a quote from Bobby Knight today that impressed me. He said, “Most people have the will to win……but few have the will to ‘prepare’ to win.”
Cheating on tests, always looking for an easy out and cutting corners for success just ends up in hallow victories. Sadly, too many kids have learned this from mom and dad. Prepare your kids for an honest race in life and you’ve given them the only thing they’ll ever need to feel good about themselves………and others.
Until tomorrow,
Essentially Esther
My children learned early that their punishment was much more harsh if they lied about something they did. The best thing was to tell me before I found out from someone else. Then we talked about what happened and that was the end of it. Did they ever lie and get away with it? I’m sure they did but at least they knew it had better be a pretty good lie or they knew what was in store for them.
Perimeters need to be set and adhered to. I watch Dr. Phil more than I care to because Rocky likes the show. I sort of have overkill on it now but was a big fan for a long time. My reason for mentioning this is because some of the parents he has on the show are so disgusting I can’t see why they ever thought they wanted to have children.
Does any family sit down and have a meal together any more? Growing up, supper was never taken up until we heard dad’s old panel truck pulling in the driveway. Then we all ate. My brother and I were not chauffeured about to events apart from the family. Where my mother and dad went, we went. We were a family and we went every where together. Granted, we went places we didn’t want to go and we didn’t get to go to some of the places we wanted…….but we weren’t raised by nanny’s or baby sitters, we had a real dad and a real mother.
I was fortunate to be what the modern world calls a “stay at home mom.” Once the children came there was no question about leaving them for a career. They were my career and I didn’t plan on “having it all.” It was harder on the kid’s dad because he didn’t have the comfort of that extra pay check coming in…..but we knew where our kids were and what they were doing. The things we couldn’t give them were substituted for things we could give them.
I’m not knocking women who work after their children are born. It’s a very personal decision and there are many good reasons for doing so. What I am knocking are parents who go after everything except their children and then wonder why their kids are so detestable. Hello……it could be a lack of parenting.
I am not a poster gal for Mother of the Year and there were a lot of times I felt inadequate and made mistakes……. but I knew if I didn’t live to see the results I’d hoped for, they would come sooner or later. I still think life’s lessons have to be shown rather than talked about. Kids will learn more from watching you in the trenches than they ever will from what you say. Kids today are no different from the era I grew up in. My brother and I learned some harsh lessons in harsh times but we also learned respect, gratitude, sacrifice and a good work ethic.
Kids are more resilient than they’re given credit for a lot of times. My prayer is that parents will become acquainted with their own kids, put their time in and try to make some decent people. They are after all like a bank. You get back what you put in it…….if you don’t like what you’re getting back……try putting more into it.
I read a quote from Bobby Knight today that impressed me. He said, “Most people have the will to win……but few have the will to ‘prepare’ to win.”
Cheating on tests, always looking for an easy out and cutting corners for success just ends up in hallow victories. Sadly, too many kids have learned this from mom and dad. Prepare your kids for an honest race in life and you’ve given them the only thing they’ll ever need to feel good about themselves………and others.
Until tomorrow,
Essentially Esther
