Before school started in the Fall Dr. Eubanks had a talk with me. He felt we should have John start in the Kansas State School for the Blind for several reasons. He wanted him to be given the best opportunity for social adaptation and learning. In a public school he felt the classes were too large for him to get much ‘one-on-one’ and he would soon fall behind. Along with that he had a sight difficulty which made him ‘different’ and might hinder him socially with the other kids. Kids can be cruel.

He felt by going to the KSSB he would be at the top of the heap with ‘partial’ vision and that would place him in a better position to grow socially, educationally and morally. He would have many advantages that wouldn’t be available in public schools. However, down the line somewhere, if his eyes improved or he was found to be able to keep up there was always the possibility of moving him back into the public school system. Dr. Eubanks was not negative for at that time we didn’t know if John would be able to keep the sight he had been given. He could, at any time, lose it all.

George and I always took Dr. Eubanks advice seriously for he was an ophthalmologist who considered the whole person…not just the eyes of his patients. After talking it over pro and con we agreed and Dr. Eubanks made the necessary pre-enrollment for us. The school was in Kansas City, Kansas and would have easy access for us since we lived a few blocks away from I-35 which would take us to the Toll Bridge and just a short drive on to the school. I mentioned before about Mr. Frakes who lived in our neighborhood, taught school there and offered to let John ride with him and another teacher each day. It was a terrific help since we only had the one vehicle and George needed it to go to work every day. Since John would be going only half-days this first year he would ride with Mr. Frakes to school and we would pick him up at noon.

We arrived at the room where we met Mrs. Salter, his teacher for kindergarten. She was very outgoing, pleasant and ‘at home’ with children. She welcomed John and introduced him to some of the other children who had already arrived. The KSSB had dormitories for the enrollment because most of them came from all over the State and it wouldn’t be possible for them to commute. Since the ‘dorm’ kids came earlier to get settled in their rooms John was about the last to arrive to class. The room was attractive in bright colors, furniture geared for little folks, a piano and all kinds of toys.

The KSSB was a community complete within itself due to the dormitory living. Students only went home at Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter. It’s buildings were attractive and the grounds well kept. The faculty and staff were friendly and obviously loved the kids. As the days went by John adapted quickly. He was quick to help the blind kids and they all liked one another. There was a time when he became obsessed with who was ‘blind’ and who had partial vision like him. Mrs. Salter finally talked to me about it since it was such a topic with him and she had decided to tell John she was blind also. She couldn’t see my reaction to her statement….my mouth all but dropped open. I had been talking with her on many occasions by that time and had never guessed she was totally blind. She wore dark glasses and I knew she had ‘traveling’ eyes but thought she had partial vision as John did. How did she get her make-up on so perfectly? How did she dress with everything matching….jewelry, clothing, shoes, hair…..the whole picture. How on earth did she keep control of children who couldn’t see and had poor attention spans? I stood in the hall many times watching through the door and as she played the piano with her back to the children who were seated in a semi-circle, if a little one got up and roamed around the room she would say, “All right, Jimmy, Suzie, Joe (or whoever)…get back in your seat.” Surely she would have to be able to see to know WHO was up roaming around. Not. That woman was amazing !! From her personal appearance to her teaching ability to her positive attitude I respected her above all others.

John was really upset when he found she was blind. He quizzed me all the way home that day. “Will she be able to see when she gets to heaven, mama? Why does she have to be blind? Can a doctor fix her like Dr. Eubanks did me? I don’t want her to be blind.” It went on and on. Actually my answers were pretty nominal. We all have to wonder why good people have bad things happen to them. It is incomprehensible to a child………if they are good, then good things should happen to them. My explanation was pretty much doctrine…. “ Only God knows these things, John. He has a reason for everything and sometimes we never know…or other times we find out later. You have bad vision compared to some people but you are happy and don’t feel sorry for yourself….so that’s how she feels…..she’s making the best of a bad thing. She could have just sat down and quit but she didn’t. She wanted to be useful and she’s gone way beyond that. We don’t need to feel sorry for her because she doesn’t feel sorry for herself.”

John fell silent as we drove along. We were both left to our thoughts of Mrs. Salter. When you can’t ‘fix’ things it hurts sometimes. I couldn’t help Mrs. Salter or a school of blind kids but I could help the little boy God gave me. It took me a while to learn the art of helping when needed but letting him work a lot of things out for himself…..it’s the age-old battle mother’s have to learn. Hands off or hands on. Knowing the difference is the invisible force that makes a mom know she’s doing the right thing……

Until tomorrow,

Essentially Esther